This post is about homonyms, not to be confused with homonids 
which were are our ancient ape-like ancestors that preferred same sex marriages [their branch on the evolutionary tree withered quite quickly due to lack of meaningful breeding with other species]. Nope. No politics today, or I’d be writing about how The Party of No thinks itself to be The Party of Know. I just love homonyms; you know, words that sound the same in the English language but have different meanings, because I like twisting words to say one thing but mean another. Oops, getting too close to politics.
Take led and lead for example. One is the past tense of lead [not to be confused with lead], the other is a soft malleable metal whose chemical symbol is Pb. I don’t know what got me onto this subject. Probably just got a wild hair up my ass. Which is certainly better than getting a wild hare up my ass. I like taking chances, but not with undomesticated rabbits in my sphincter. That could hurt.
Homonyms are also why I like Spell-check so much. Spell-check goes to show ya just what a waste of time my grade school education was. All those spelling tests and all. Now you don’t even have to know squat about spelling, you just gotta be a good guesser (which is pretty much what I did in grade school anyway). Don’t know a word? No problem; close is good enough. Just type something in and Spell-check will finger out what you mint meant. You may think, ‘hay, thats not fare’. But as long as it doesn’t have a red wiggly line under it, my wording is correct.
When I was writing this, I was also on Skype talking to my sister in Germany. Who by the way said they were having huge Occupy Wall Street protests in all the big cities over there, like Hamburg, Hanover and Berlin. Germans occupying anything is scary for me. But anyway, Heidi chimed in with this condom conundrum: How would you write the saying: “There are three twos in the English language?” Two, Too, To? Well Spell-check froze up on me with that one, so I better go before I put a spell on you. 
Hansi's Hallucinations 
Comments on: "Homonyms" (17)
Very nice!! A lot of ESL learners have told me that English is one of the most difficult languages to learn.
Only surpassed by German.
Entirely too much talking about your butt. But, Butt, Butte, Butter,
I heard that the Party of No want to ban homonyms because they are same sound words!
LOL. They no doubt prefer something like French wear you have male and female gender words.
Hansi, love this post.. Accept, opps, I mean except your rear comments.
By rear comments do you mean the ones at the back end of the post, or the comments I raised since early childhood?
My friend brought back a brass sphincter from his trip to Egypt. It is shaped like a lion with a man’s head.
Hope he doesn’t get a wild hair up his brass 🙂
Hansi, thanks for your mentioning me! I love homonyms and, when we skype next time, I’ll give you a few ( e.g.: The new maid made a fair fare). Here’s a little poem for you, but you have to read it out loud:
1 1 was a race horse
2 1 was 1 2
1 1 1 1 race
2 1 1 1 2
Like it?
You surpassed yourself here: “I like taking chances, but not with undomesticated rabbits in my sphincter.” 🙂
Yea…that was taking it to another level; higher or lower I don’t quite know. I think I’m staying with only domesticated rabbits in my sphincter from now on.
Love it….Saying it out loud is the only way it makes sense….thanks
Onederful, hansi! You one me over, I mean won me over with today’s post. Have a good won!
That was a good won alright.
Thanks to all for participating in this madness.
Just wondering Hansi if you knew the new gnu?
Know the new gnu; why no.