mind expanding nonsense

Posts tagged ‘sexual inuendo’

Got My Mojo Workin’

I got my Mojo workin’, an it sure gonna work on you.” You just gotta love them old blues songs, this one by Muddy Waters, cause not only are they laden with sexual innuendo and imagery, but are jam packed with a big dose of sexual energy. Now I’ll leave it up to your imagination as to how Muddy’s Mojo might work on you. But rest assured that you’ll either end up achy and bruised all over, or the most satisfied person on Earth.  Either way, walking may be difficult for a few days thereafter.

Sadly, not all folks got their Mojos working these days. Shit is stressing some of us out. And this is even happening in the African American community. Why just the other night I saw this commercial on TV featuring a Black middle aged couple, who suddenly found themselves in an intimate situation while folding clothes, and a special moment arose. Unfortunately that was the only thing that rose, cause this guy apparently had erectile dysfunction. But not to worry, he had taken some Cialis, and his Mojo was gonna work just fine.

Now here’s when things started getting a little weird, and made me re-think the whole notion of watching TV while stoned. Instead of letting nature take it’s course right then and there as Muddy’s Mojo would, this Cialis stuff makes ya get a little kinky. Cause the next thing ya see, and I shit you not, is our couple up in a hot air balloon making goo goo eyes at each other as they float off into the horizon.

Now I’ve heard of the fabled ‘Mile High Club’, but I never believed in it. Maybe it’s different in first class, but the thought of doing the Big Nasty in an economy class airplane bathroom is just plain disgusting in my opinion. Those planes are filthy, especially after everyone on board’s had a few drinks. But balling in a balloon…Hmmm. Maybe it’s a “black thing” as Pat Robertson would say. Something affluent Blacks enjoy doing.  Wonder if Herman Cain’s ever done it? And with who?

I don’t know what got me on to this subject. Must be  the influence of all them liberal bloggers I’ve been following of late. Talk about filthy minds. But hey.  This ain’t about sex. It’s about me working in retirement, again. So instead of having my Mojo working, this post should read “I got my ancient ass working on a massive drunk driving caseload in the Probation Department (yet again) and it gonna be workin’ on you if ya drink and drive.” You see, after two weeks off for the holidays, and a move of my unit to a different location, I’m back fighting crime again. And the love/hate relationship begins anew. Love, because I like the easy money, and hate, because I’m soo done with probation work, even on a part-time basis. But damn, the money is good, and 8 to 12 hours a week. Well…..

I hate being a social liberal, but financial conservative. Financially, the only thing I want “occupied” is my bank account filled with as many digits as possible. The thing is, an erotic balloon ride sounds really sweet to my liberal side. But my conservative side says,that’s a lot of money, you should be paying down debt; maybe just lighting a candle in the laundry room would do just as well. Then the bureaucrat  in me steps in and says, Anyway, there’s a chance one of us may fall out of the balloon basket while ‘enjoying’ the view. I can’t win.

The bottom line is, all this working stuff is not only interfering with my passions, but it’s also cutting into my blogging time. So I thought I’d share this little dilemma. Hey. That’s what blogging is all about, ain’t it?   Or just maybe, it’s all about attitude and how ya look at things.  Christmas is just around the corner; and my adult children do have expensive tastes.  So it’s off to Santa’s Workshop.  I gotta go and get my Mojo workin’.


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