mind expanding nonsense

Posts tagged ‘Drawing’

No Explanation Needed

Sometimes these drawings need no explanation whatsoever.  They are what they are, and they don’t need a deeper understanding (which could only lead your filthy imagination to dirty thoughts, and that’s not good).  Other times I just come up short and have nothing to say.  That’s because I drew all this stuff months ago, and have since, totally forgotten what  I was thinking about.  There are however, brief glimpses of insight when I draw and write at the same time.  That’s the best of both worlds.


I call this one Two Thousand Sixteen.  Mainly because that’s the year I drew all this stuff (gawd do I ever wish it was 2016 again).  Pretty tricky dating your drawings with a drawing of the date (had no clue at the time).  I don’t know what to tell ya about this one.  Maybe you should look at it a while, then close your eyes and imagine all these things floating around in your living-room.  If you then open your eyes and they’re still there, better call 911.

Switching from mindless babel blog to art blog, what I’m trying to do is create shapes with contrasting colors.  Don’t try to read too much into them, for to me, ‘subject matter doesn’t matter’. Some of them work okay: the green and yellow striped oval is nice, but don’t look at it to long – your mind will start to wonder. The pink and green peace symbol: so so.  The orange with blue polka-dot sliced salami…I’ll let you be the judge.

Drawing vs Illustration

illustrations 009

Sounds kinda like a wrestling match:  In this corner we have drawing.  World light-weight champion.  And in the other corner we have Illustration, arch enemy of Drawing.  No holds bared, 10 rounds, catch-as-catch-can.  Winner takes all.

It used to be that I’d dream up a post and then draw something to illustrate what I was talking about.  That was a challenge cause I had to draw something specific that reflected what was written.  Lately, I’ve been just drawing, and dreaming up some bullshit to go along with it (as is the case in this post).  [But maybe ‘bullshit’ is too strong a word for the light-hearted, good-natured banter loaded with sexual inuendo which often times shows up on this blog, and should be reserved for political utterances.  Although that type of ‘bullshit’ is more like a truth that everybody knows is a falsehood.  Out right lying more aptly describes what politicians do, at least on my side of the pond.]  Just about every post of late, is just another finished page out of my current sketch-book.  Which when posted in chronological order tells a story, documents my progress as an artist, or is a case study in senior dementia.

illustrations 006

Sometimes there’s some actual coherency to the drawings; but I’ll let you be the judge of that.  Maybe I should get more serious about my art (such as it is), and take a life drawing class at the local community college.  They probably wouldn’t let me in.  They’d just be thinking, “here’s another old pervert wanting to see some titties.”

Oh well…maybe all this drawing is just what it is and no more.  That would be fine.

illustrations 007

Where’d My Muse Go?

muse 001

Drawing for me goes in cycles, or bursts of creative activity (sometimes lasting weeks), after which I’m totally spent and empty.  The only thing I wanna do after all that action is lay back and have a cigarette.  Well, my drawing climaxed a few weeks ago, and I haven’t been doing much since.  It was all I could do to take colored pencils to this recent ink drawing.  I think my drawing muse done up and went.


In Greek mythology, the Muses were nine goddesses, daughters of Zeus, who personified the arts, literature, dance and music, and who often inspired some of us mere mortals to excel in these areas.  Thing is, there was no specific Muse for drawing.  So, I’m without a Muse.  Thalia is okay for comedy, and Erato good for love poetry (do dirty limericks count?), but no Drawalinggus. So it’s no wonder I’m in a slump, I have no hot, scantily clad goddess to inspire me.

If I did have a Muse, I think I’d call mine something like Charlena, Betty-Lou or Veronica (sounds like a bunch of ex-wives),  Goddesses of sleaze and bad taste.  Got to be gaudy, with “big hair” and lots of cheap jewelry, kinda like fishing lures hanging from their ears.  Clothing is always optional, with big bazooms a must.

I thought I’d post a few worthy candidates that I wouldn’t mind being inspired by.

rocket girl 2




This morning I was opening my e-mail, as I do every morning, to see if I got any comments on my blog. When I opened one from alan of tbaoo, instead of getting a cheery, upbeat bit about how wonderful my quirky drawings are, and what a great wit I am, I got a request for a guest post, featuring a drawing of what I thought he looked like, along with some commentary to match.

Well, drawing comes naturally to me. And commentary is a breeze. But making the two cohesive with some degree of sense to it all; that could be a problem. Also, I don’t do portraits. Doing likenesses is difficult, and I tend to shy away from all things difficult at this stage of life. But during a brief flash of lucidity, I thought, “Hey, I’ve never seen this guy (bloke) before in my life, and there’s no pictures of him on his blog. “No Problemo”.  And besides, if he wants me to do a likeness of what I think he looks like, then if it don’t really look like him, that’s his problem, and he better get to work on starting to look like my drawing.

Now,  I’ve been following tbaoo for well over a year, and I don’t really know much about alan (besides his first name). I know he lives in Australia, somewhere near the beach. But the whole place is just one big island, so that don’t help. He has some kind of mysterious job, that he alludes to, and even  goes to sometimes, or is in between. He does have good taste in music; seems fairly progressive; and supports our President Obama. So he’s not a total wanker. Then there’s his on-going story about Moony (a bloke) and his wild R-rated adventures (an alter-ego?).

Anyway, I don’t know why I drew him as being bald, maybe that’s the way he sounds to me from his blog. Strangely, when I read him, I don’t hear an accent of any kind. Must be all them lower case letters he uses, and his refusal to capitalize anything.

So there you have it and there it is. Pretty cool for old Hansi, to have now gone international. Be sure to check  tbaoo out. Hansi will be there too. Hopefully on the same day, but today for him is tomorrow for me, so if he posts his today, I won’t be able to post mine till tomorrow.  Evil date line

Now how’s that for for one big happy daisy-chain? Hey Alan, what’s buggering?

Waiting for Saint Patrick

What the heck.  It’s Saint Patrick’s day today, and although I didn’t plan on posting today, The wife has Irish music blasting, green stuff all over the house, and a corned-beef brisket in the refrigerator.  So here’s some stuff I did on the Eve before Saint Paddy’s Day.

Now with Daylight savings going full blast, it doesn’t get dark here in Southern California till after 7:30 p.m.  So you don’t need the lights on till later (is that the savings part?).  But when it does get dark, ya gotta turn on the lights.  But again, if you’re really into a drawing, ya don’t want to get off your fat ass, just to turn on the lights; you could loose artist momentum.  So you just sit there in the dark and finish drawing.  Thing of it is, most of my stuff looks really good in the dark.

Finally!  We’re getting a good storm system through my half of California.   That means rain, and a good deep drink for the garden and fruit trees.  It’s about time; had zippo in January and February.

Dave Hole is an Australian blues guitar player, who is gaining in popularity here in the States after Chicago based Alligator Records signed him.  Dave is noted for his stratospheric guitar solos, and playing slide guitar with his ‘bottle-neck’ over the top of the guitar neck.  I was right up there in the stratosphere with him when I drew that one.

So Happy Saint Patrick’s Day to one and all!  Is 10 a.m. too early to slurp down a Guinness?

My 200th Post

“Wowie-Zowie Hansi.  Congratulations.”   “I’m a big fan of yours and read your shit every-time it’s deposited in my mail box.  Keep up the good work; love the drawings btw.”

I know, “big fucking  deal”.  Writing about the fact that one has been compulsive enough to crank-out  200 (that’s right Two Hundred !) posts and mange to say nothing of true importance, let alone anything profound, is an exercise in egomania and self absorption [kinda sounds like something more akin to an adult diaper than mind state].

So why am I writing about the fact that I’ve turned 200 today?  Well, because I ain’t got shit. Yep… No big Ideas for new posts.  Nothing to say.  Although technically, writing about nothing is really the antithesis of writing about nothing, cause in reality you are wring about Something, it’s just that the something is nothing.  On some level that makes sense.  Anyway, I got a whole bunch of drawings I’ve never posted before and wanna show them off.  Hey, I ain’t just sitting around the house doing nothing.

So, using the tried and true Bloggers trick on how to squeeze out a post when ya don’t have one, I’ll use this opportunity to rant about this whole 200th post thing.  I don’t know about you, but I don’t keep track of how many posts I’ve done on a little piece of paper filled hash-marks.  Nope WordPress tells me how many I’ve done every time I ‘publish’ something.  That’s cool, cause sometimes I forget to put a hash-mark down on my special piece of paper I keep next to my key-board.

But now, WordPress is setting goals for me and providing a little sliding chart with my next goal [in this case 200] clearly visible, which I need to achieve.  But isn’t it good to have goals?  Hell no.  Not if you’re retired.  Damn, if you be retired, you’ve already hit the big goal; which was to no longer  have any goals.  I don’t like things to be forced upon me.  And that especially goes for societal ‘norms’ or expectations.   And I don’t like the subtle WordPress encouragement for me to continue in compulsive behavior, in this case blogging.

Anyway, sure glad I got that off my chest, and also snuck in a no-brainer post.  But since my Hallucinations are turning more into a drawing blog, I thought I’d let my art-work speak for me instead of words.

OK OK!  I know some of these drawings are a little “Questionable”.  But consider also, maybe you have a dirty mind and are seeing more than what’s really there.  I mean like, if you’re seein’ penises and vaginas instead of Zeppelin airships and yawning teddy-bears, well shame on you.  The guy in the picture (me) is bailing  from any such notion.

A fist coming out of a man’s crotch?  A metaphor maybe.  Or maybe, I  just got the anatomy all wrong.  But I got to admit, it’s pretty hard not to see dominoes going up someone’s kiester in the last one.  But it was originally drawn for my post “The Hershey Highway,”  which is definitely not my way. so those a really little chocolate bars.

Hansi turns 100

Well it’s milestone madness. I’m not a hundred years old, but sometimes I feel like it. Nope, this is my one hundredth post. Big deal, I know, but it still blows my mind that since late last November, I’ve cranked out 100 posts of shear bullshit, with drawings to match. This might just be a case of blowing my own horn, but I want the world to know of my achievements, and assure everybody that Hansi is still full of shit, and there’s more to come.

A little background whilst we are in such a celebratory mood. My son, Bad Deacon, had a few websites that always intrigued me. The most influential being Bad Deacon Design, which was a chronicle of his print making, and not only featured the wood print process, but also displayed his finished works along with drawings and commentary.

Like Dear Old Dad, my son was an Art Major in college also, but instead of going on to fight crime, he went to UC Berkeley and got an engineering degree. Something useful. I was always impressed, not only with his art work (print making being his preferred medium) but with how he did it, and how this enabled him to display his work in what amounted to be his own personal gallery. And if ya do art, ya want to show it, but not necessarily via galleries or craft shows.

So, last Thanksgiving, while home for a visit, the Bad One set me up with a freebie Word Press site, and showed me how he got his work on-line by using a digital camera and how to crop and edit the photos in Photoshop. Magic…Sure beat scribbling crayons on my computer screen (the only way that came to my mind).

So I thought “Cool, I”m drawing daily; trying to regain some old skills that had sat dormant for far too long; let’s give this a go”.  I’m gonna follow in my Son’s footsteps (Hey, ain’t it supposed to be the other way around?)  The rest is history, or at least in the Archives.

Here are a few of my favorite drawings that resulted from some good strong hallucinations. Thank you for partaking in them too.

Nerf gun




Sarah.  What does ‘blood libel’ mean?

TriPhoria the pleasure rocket

Had to throw that one in.  And while we’re at it,  I’ll close with this:

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