The Golden Egg I’m enjoying working at The House of Pain for my former employer in Probationland is swiftly turning from gold to bronze, with the real possibility it could turn to shit sometime soon. I’ve been ‘re-assigned’ from a first-time drunk driving caseload to help on a mixed caseload of felons, substance abusers and domestic violence offenders. Thankfully I don’t have to see them. They all go to a ‘Kiosk’ (an ATM in reverse), where they report monthly by paying five bucks and pushing a bunch of buttons, instead of seeing an asshole like myself who’s only going to tell them what a bunch of fuck-ups they are, and how they’re likely to go back to jail if they don’t get their shit together. I’d sure pay five dollars to avoid that.
What this change basically means is, I’m gonna have to go from cranking out one form of mindless bullshit to another form of mindless bullshit. You would think that all mindless bullshit is the same. But it isn’t. Dealing with drunk drivers is not like dealing with crooks. They’re just normal folks who got wasted on alcohol, and while totally shit-faced, decided it would be a good idea to get in a car and drive. We all do it…They just got caught.
With this Kiosk crowd, I’m dealing with wife beaters, drug addicts, thieves, and the like. That’s gonna be a whole new learning curve for me. Or rather, re-learning all the crap I swore I’d never do again in my life when I retired ten years ago. Funny how my words often come around and bite me in the ass. We’ll see how it goes. I might be closer to complete retirement than I think.