I cancelled Amazon Prime the other day. Had to Google how to do it first cause there wasn’t a big red button on their website to click on and put ya outta your misery. Nope, ain’t that easy. There was hoops to jump through first: “Your Prime membership”, then “Accounts and Lists”, which produced a drop-down menu were “End Membership” was hidden among a host of other crap. But it didn’t end there. I had to wade through four different pop-up windows questioning my intentions if that’s what I really wanted to do; offering me another eight days for only $1.99 – such a deal. It was kinda like the dope peddler, who after offering you the first fix for free, keeps tempting you to give in and give it just one more shot. “You know ya like it, come-on just give it one more try”. What really fried me was after going through this whole rig-a-ma-roll, I got an email giving just one more chance. They don’t give up!
All this to cancel my free 30 day trial before it rolled over to a twelve buck monthly charge – don’t want that. Don’t get me wrong. Amazon Prime is great… if ya wanna buy stuff. I didn’t have to get of my ass, get dressed, go to a store and fight crowds this Christmas season, just sit back, select what I wanted, read the reviews, compare prices and then watch free Prime videos until my package arrived in two days. Then I did have to get off my ass, cause I got an email with a picture of my delivery at my front door. [ For some reason they always left it on the side of my screen-door which made it near impossible to open outwards; could you image what would happen if I’d ordered food from Whole Foods – One could starve to death inside their house with a pile of rotting food just outside their front door.]
Prime also relieves ya from having to endure any human contact whatsoever. The Wife and I can hunker down with our doors locked, drapes closed and watch MSNBC all day. It’s a scary world out their filled with terrorists, criminals, illegal aliens ( and I’m not talking about the ones from Mars passing themselves off as earthlings), armed evangelicals and Trump supporters. Can’t be too careful these days.
I can see how folks might get hooked on Prime. Sure makes life easier. I just don’t wanna become addicted.