mind expanding nonsense

Pain In The Ass

12-26-14 004

For the last few days I’ve had this sharp almost debilitating pain in my right buttock (buttocks?)  Don’t know the plural, but right now I wished I’d only have one – the left one.  Maybe it’s sciatica.  I’ve had that before, with pains shooting down my leg.  Got it after roofing my house a few years back when I was 58.  Saved a lot of money doin’ it myself, but more than made up for it in pain and suffering – which is free, so I came out ahead on the deal.

I don’t know what I did this time.  I’m in pretty good shape for an old guy, and go to the gym five to six times a week where I do exercises for my back and ass, or “glutes” as in gluteus maximus muscles.  Seems like my “glutes” have gone kaputz.  The thing of it is, IT HURTS!  Then it starts to bug the shit outta me, knowing that every time I stand up I’m gonna be in pain.  My desire to stand up therefore, or do anything standing up therefive, has diminished greatly, to the point where all I wanna do is sit down and take a load off.

Funny how pain can also alter your mood.  When it comes to mood altering, I prefer herbal alterations over pain.  And prefer euphoria over impatience, lack of tolerance and being grumpy and pissed off all the time because ya don’t like what’s happening to ya.  Thankfully I know that nothing is permanent (except your permanent record – which I’ve kept spotless) and that this too shall pass; the pain in my ass.

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Comments on: "Pain In The Ass" (15)

  1. “My desire to stand up therefore…” You’ll never get ahead sitting down on the job.”

  2. Hope you feel better. Try an osteopath–they will give you exercises to help. In the meantime, sit on the floor, cross your bad leg over your good leg and press down on the knee of the bad leg–usually takes the pressure off.

    And don’t forget: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7tgqYWQKBnw

  3. Gee. My aunt told me a spoon of mustard is good for pain. Maybe it was cramps, can’t recollect to the letter. Worth a try.

  4. Yep, sounds like sciatica. I do prevention exercises every day–I don’t wait for it to show up before I try to get rid of it! So far I’ve been successful for quite a few years.Lots of info floating around on the ‘net. While you’re just sitting around, you might investigate. Unless you’re completely paralyzed I’d say self-diagnosis and self-treatment will fix the problem.

  5. So sorry for the pain! My husband just had hip replacement surgery. One hip joint was shot from work-related repetitive motion, but the original pain was very oddly more like sciatica. He went three years with treatments for the wrong problem. If something keeps up, just don’t let it go on too long without getting a good diagnosis and don’t suffer unnecessarily. Happy New Year, Hansi…hope it will be pain-free!

    • Thanks for the encouragement. I’m getting better, but will see the doctor if this persists for any amount of time.

  6. hope for a speedy recovery….hey that commercial…get that brace that pushes on your calf…they say that works. They wouldn’t lie I’m sure…:/

    • I saw that one, thought about it, but figured $19.99 (plus shipping and an excessive amount of handling) wouldn’t do much of anything.

  7. Spanking the area might distract you from the original pain.

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