mind expanding nonsense


ebay 002

I’m not a high-tech kinda guy.  Yea, I have a website, know how to digitally Photoshop my crude bathroom wall drawings, and sometimes, even actively communicate with other bloggers.  I have e-mail, and have lately taken to on-line banking, paying my bills on-line (that postage was staring to get expensive).  I guess that’s pretty high-tech, but I don’t have a cell phone, and don’t do Facebook.  What a total waste of time that is, unlike of course, blogging which is a total un-waste of time.

I’m more an analogue type of guy, and have the record collection to prove it.  Well over a thousand 45’s from the golden age of rock and roll (1955 – 1965), plus hundreds of albums from the 60’s and early 70’s.  I listen to that stuff almost every day, on a 45 year old Pioneer tuner-amp, with two 12 inch speakers.  Don’t get much better than that.

And speaking of the best of two worlds, I’ve just discovered ebay (they never capitalize it).  Wow!  No more rummaging through thrift stores, no more fruitless garage sales.  Now old Hansi can sit on his ancient ass, in the comfort of his own home, well medicated, and get on with the business of re-living his youth by re-buying every record he had as a youth. [Re-living my teenage years is not all that great.  Yea I was younger, but I was also horny all the time back then and had little opportunity to solve the problem without taking matters into one’s own hands.  Being a senior citizen is far less frustrating (except when ya have to pee).  I’m rarely horny, and I like it that way.  So does The Wife].

The cool thing is:  Everything you could ever want is on ebay.  All ya gotta do is make a bid.  It’s kinda like an auction, but not like the stock market, which is more like a casino. Not only can you be as obsessive-compulsive as you want in accumulating worthless shit (in my case records), but you can also be competitive!  I’m a little competitive in nature.  I like being the best at something (like blogging).  So a little competition is okay…as long as you always win.  But you don’t always win on ebay.  That’s because you’re not the only obsessively com-pulsed fool out their who wants a certain item as cheaply as he can get it.  There’s flocks of other fools equally (if not more so) com-pulsed as you, who are even cheaper bastards.   All ya have to do is be the highest bidder.

Here’s the part where money talks and bullshit starts to walk.  You gotta try and figure out how badly  those other bidders want the same item.  As bad as you?  Then you gotta pay up, or have a ‘strategy’.  You can place an automatic bid with a top dollar amount.  Or, see what the bidding is during the time it’s for sale (there’s a running clock and emails warning you when the bidding stops).  You never want to be too early in placing your last bid.  It’s best to wait for the last seconds before shooting your wade financially; don’t wanna pay more than ya have to.  Thing is, those other guys are competing with mutually equal contempt, trying squeeze you, hoping to have what should be rightfully yours.

Usually it’s not like that, at least for the crap I’m interested in.  A lot of times, if a thing hasn’t sold for a while.  The seller will lower the starting bid, or let you ‘Make a Bid”.  That’s when you can really be a cheapskate, and low-ball the seller, who is obviously desperate to get rid of it.  Pretty cool.  I call it cellar the seller. I get a lot of albums that way. All I gotta do then is Pay my Pal, and wait for the mail to arrive.

Great way to digitally get all the analogue I want.

ebay 001



Comments on: "ebay" (12)

  1. “Usually it’s not like that, at least for the crap I’m interested in ”

    ebay! where our “had to haves” become someone else’s “gotta have”.

  2. farm auctions are way more fun. That’s when strategy really pays off.

  3. Question is, can you get a new stylus for your turntable on ebay?

  4. No more mall or traffic. Buy what I need on ebay , shipping cost worth no aggravation

  5. I think I bought something off eBay once. I need to sell some of my albums. I could make a killing if I got enough folk who wanted them bad enough. Guess I’ll look for you when I auction them off.

  6. You just discovered ebay? It’s only been around since 1995. The Dark Ages in www terms.

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