mind expanding nonsense

More Fun With Spam

I don’t know about you, but I get a shit-load of Spam daily on this here WordPress blog.  It used to be, that I’d get 30 to 40 spam comments, wanting me to checkout “Lolitas” and “Teen Models”.  I couldn’t  believe it, being spammed by pedophile sites, which if you go to, ya leave a digital footprint that could end up getting your ass busted and winding up going to prison, where pedophiles are  the lowest rung on the criminal totem pole, and  preyed upon mercilessly. [Funny how karma works: the sodomiz-er becoming the sodomiz-ee.]

Well, magically that ain’t happening anymore, but I still  get spam.  Not in my “About” folder (which tells the world who I am and where all that ‘kiddie porn’ was goin’),  but into a prior post lampooning spam, entitled Fun With Spam.  Frickin’ idiots; another case of karma comin’ around and biting ya in the ass.

Some folks go through elaborate steps to avoid getting spam comments.  Boxes you have to click, confirming you are not spam.  Or, better yet, a series of random, script-like letters you have to decipher and re-type, just to make a stupid-ass generic comment such as I often times do like:  “Great post, well done, enjoyed it a lot.  Do you like young boys?”  To the right are some of my favorite passwords I’d like to see used >>>

Well, I’ve decided, if ya cant’ fight em, join em, and am now letting selected pieces of spam to be published on my blog.  Not to worry though, they’ll be highly edited, and you won’t be able to link to them.  Sorry. about that, and  for kiddie porn fans, you’ll just  have to Google 288 (a) California Penal Code

Here’s one of my favorites:

balkonreont said:

April 7, 2011 at 7:05 am

вакансии ремонт квартир Улучшение и отделка помещений, комнат или дач – это насущная на сегодняшний день проблема большинства людей, решившихся, наконец, привести в порядок свое жилище. Мало того, что улучшение – это занятие трудоемкое и напряженное, еще и найти заслуживающую доверия компанию, занимающуюся ремонтом комнат или домов сейчас практически нельзя. Дело в том, что все меньше и меньше в России есть компаний, делающих свою работу качественно, эффективно и недорого. ремонт квартиры ключ
Однако наша компания является приятным исключением из этого неприятного правила. Мы вот уже много лет занимается ремонтом помещений, комнат, дач и еще ни разу нам не поступало от наших клиентов ни неприятных отзывов, ни каких-либо жалоб. ремонт однокомнатной квартиры под ключ Большой опыт наших специалистов, а также высокий профессионализм всех без исключения наших сотрудников, поможет сделать хорошо, качественно и – главное – доступно как косметический, так и капитальный ремонт. новая квартира ремонт Современное оборудование, новые технологии планировки и дизайна, а также индивидуальный подход к каждому клиенту и гибкая система скидок сделали нашу фирму самой успешной на сегодня организацией, оказывающей услуги реставрации и отделке офисов, комнат или дач. ремонт квартир в долгопрудном
ремонт квартир ремонт квартиры

Hansi said:

April 7, 2011 at 11:13 am

Hey it’s Cousin Balky. Glad ya liked the post, but frankly, your comment was all Greek to me, and I don’t think I’ll be Russian over to visit your site.

Lastly there’s the ‘flattery will get you everywhere’ type of spam, that boosts your ego so much, ya can’t help but just approve it.  Check out this bullshit and consider whose blog they’re posting it on.

bedside proteinpulverizer
branchconga0.dmusic.net/journal/1677370 xxx

fantastic post, very informative. I wonder why the opposite experts of this sector don’t realize this. You must continue your writing. I’m confident, you’ve a great readers’ base already!


Comments on: "More Fun With Spam" (35)

  1. That part about “Современное оборудование, новые технологии планировки и дизайна,” That was pretty obscene. I’m surprised you left it i there 😉

  2. I believe that is a limerick in the tune of “there once was a man from Nantucket”……..or is it Gdansk?

  3. I get very little spam actually. I hate the sites that use the awful scripts you can’t decifer and the numbers all to avoid the spam. I yell at my blogger friends all the time to turn that shit off. But no, I don’t get much, unless you call my cheesy friends spam. lol…I personally adore them all.

  4. I love checking out the spam. It always induces a chuckle or two. Or leaves me open mouthed and confused. No, hang on a minute…that’s your blog, right?

  5. They all seem like originally written in foreign tongue but crude translations into English. You get to know the pattern but some bloggers think they are genuine comments and leave them on their comments.

  6. I love Spam fritters 🙂 mmmmmmm

  7. Hello dear hansi, do you remember how we communicated with you?
    Long ago you could not see, I am Oksana – with Russia, do you remember me?

    “Come to my page – let’s talk, I’m waiting!

  8. Cousin Balky and the bedsideproteinpulverizer … you are such a cack. Keep up the good work. The world needs your writing. I have never read such an informative post.

  9. There is a degree of comicality to spam before you just outright delete it. My favorite is the “job opportunity for you, dear sir, to kindly help an African prince manage foreign assets”. The grammatical errors alone repeated reads before eventual deletion.

    • I’ve gotten that one, even responded to His Majesty. What a bunch of B S.


      • My favorite one of those claimed that the Mafia, the CIA and the Vatican were all going to merge. The result would be this giant surplus of cash and the claim was that if you sent in $100 you could claim a share. The organizers got something like $200,000 and supposedly went to jail for fraud, but you have to wonder about the people who sent in the money.

      • You mean it wasn’t true and I’m not gonna get my cut?


  10. My favorite spams thank me for writing something responsible for saving their lives…I don’t know what I’ll do if I start getting kiddie porn site.

  11. Trying to make up for lost time from last week … and SPAM is such a great attention getter and appetite stimulant. Your first response is classic!

  12. Don’t get any spam. ::cries:: Do get a lot of reallllllly fucking bizarre search-terms for how people got to my site. Get those?

    • You bet i get strange search terms. I bet a lot of those folks are sorely disappointed when my blog pops up.


  13. Enjoyed your humorous post Hansi. I see that you’re interested in Spam – well- have I got a deal for you! It’s easy and free – simply send $100 in unmarked bills to the following address and I guarantee that my product will give you untold pleasure beyond your wildest dreams. Retired gentlemen have been experiencing relief from my S.P.A.M. (Socially Permissive Activator for Males) for generations and I know you will too…

    • Wow! My money is in the mail. Does a new wife come with it?


      • Hansi – FYI your replies often don’t show in my Notifications except as your blog image and the word ‘Reply’ so I have to go to your site to see what you said – no problem really but mysterious…

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