mind expanding nonsense

Black Crayola Friday

Boy is today  ever a special day.  Not only is it Crayola Friday, and actually being posted on a Friday, but it’s Black Friday too!  How much more of a cosmic alignment can ya get than that?  So after spending the night  freezing my ass off in a tent outside the local Best Buy store, and cursed with pumpkin pie flatulence, I thought I’d check-in with my latest hallucinations.

First off, camping outside of Best Buy sure beats Occupying something, cause instead of getting pepper spray for breakfast, you get to run inside the store before dawn and start buying shit.  And with a hearty case of Thanksgiving flatulence under your belt (but rapidly seeping out), you can rest assured that there won’t be that much competition as to who gets that 55 inch flat-screen TV first.  [That’s gonna be so awesome having that puppy smack dab in the middle of our double-wide.]

This week I picked my eight year old grandson from school.  And on the way home, he asked me what Black Friday was.  Wow, how do ya explain that to a 3rd grader?  Keeping in mind that this kid is fairly bright and reads at an 11th grade level. [Hmm…wonder if he’s ready for some Hansi instead of Grandpa?]  So I wanted to give him a full explanation instead of some off-hand sarcastic reply like, “It’s the day when people start buying a lot of goddamned crap to give to a bunch of ingrates for X-mas.”

But first, I wanted to tell him what it was not!  It wasn’t an unlucky day when a lot of bad stuff could happen to you.  Nor was it the End of the World or something like that.  I can remember being scared shit-less as a kid, when some adult said some off-hand remark that I believed was true.  And anyway, the End of the World isn’t supposed to happen until 2012; and hopefully after Christmas.  Wouldn’t want the END to ruin the everyone’s holidays.  Maybe if we offered the Mayan Sun gods a few virgins, we could delay the End.  In America, our Son god prefers tithes and cash offerings.

Back to my grandson.  So I explained to him what accounting was; and how if you had a business, what a profit or loss was, and how the two were entered on a ledger sheet.  Black for a profit (after you pay your lobbyists), or red for a loss, like when your Republican  Congressman failed to pass legislation to only tax the poor.

He was getting it.  And as we passed buy a shopping mall, I told him that Black Friday was the day all those stores started to make a profit.  Because tons of people were there starting to buy a lot of useless crap to give to a bunch of ungrateful In-laws for X-mas, when you see em once a year.

He seemed to get the picture.

And speaking of pictures, once again I enlisted the help of my 3 year old grandson to do some background work on these gems.

 

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Comments on: "Black Crayola Friday" (20)

  1. You did Black Friday and Crayola Friday? What drive you have…:-) I stayed away, fear of terrorists’ attacks. With so many folk in one place, you never know. 🙂

    • Ya can’t be too overly cautious these days, that’s why I hope to do all my shopping online.

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  2. Glad you explained all that to me. I thought black friday had to do with a tryptophen overdose that made people crazy in stores. Now I know the truth.

  3. Poor guy on top. Money sifting right through his fingers. Most of us know the feeling these days although there’s not as much to lose.

  4. Isn’t Black Friday yet another way to siphon filthy lucre from the 99% to the 1%? Then why is it so popular? Line up to be shorn, little lambs!

  5. I just stay home & read about it in the news… crayola Friday though- that’s new to me! Thanks for the enlightenment!

    • Thanks for stopping by. Crayola Friday is a usual feature here, but doesn’t always happen on a Friday.

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  6. i think it might be time for your grandson to have his own blog .. with adult supervision of course, may be you could find such a person hansi .. 🙂

  7. LOL! We may have to have you arrrested for child abuse 🙂

    • Child abuse? This ain’t Penn State here. I prefer to think of it as “enrichment”. 🙂

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  8. I know I’m late, but hey – better late than never. So in return, I’ve nominated you for Grandpa of the Year. Hope you had a good Thanksgiving.

  9. Outrageous … Crayola Friday on a Friday!

    I think I need as much instruction on BF as your grandson. BF here is just a Friday that falls on the 13th and unless you guys have got a different calendar over there … (actually, thinking about that, maybe I wouldn’t be totally surprised … 😉

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