mind expanding nonsense

Calling Bullshit

While I’m on a roll with nifty words and phrases [see my posts: Skank and Lying Sack of Shit] I thought I’d have to throw this one into the mix. If you are a frequent follower of the this blog, you’ve probably already noticed that bullshit plays a big part in all my writing: drawings too. But why I like the term/word Bullshit is because it’s so versatile, and has a multitude of meanings and applications.

I had to cancel a fishing trip with one of my good buddies because of a family emergency. And as a result will be missing out on a lot of good bullshit. Nothing better than fishin’, drinkin’ and the bullshit that inevitably follows. And my bud, Geezerpuss, is so filled with arcane knowledge on a multitude of subjects, that one might even say that he is full of bullshit, or, a great bullshitter.

But leaving my fascination with potty mouth posts behind, I think there is one application for the word that is most appropriate these days. And that would be: “Calling Bullshit.”  Calling Bullshit, for me, is an expression of disapproval or refusal to accept something you know just isn’t true.

I remember being in Yosemite in 2004 during the presidential debates between John Kerry and George Bush. Old “W” was telling some real whoppers in those debates and bending the truth sideways. The debates were being broadcast in the Curry Village Cafeteria, so I was in mixed company and had to watch what I said. Well when “W” told a huge fib, the only way I could express my dis-approval  was by covering my mouth , and while feigning a cough, yell out “Bullshit”. I know, it’s a classic ploy but still highly effective.

So, all bullshitting aside, when you hear or confront something you just know isn’t true or just plain doesn’t sit right [ commonly know as horse shit – different animal, same bi-product]. I’d encourage you to just “Call Bullshit”. Simple as that! Much less offensive than saying “Fuck You”, but still packing that wallop of dis-approval. What you are really doing is calling a “timeout” You’re letting the Bullshitter know, that you, the Bullshit-ee, is not buying it. “Let’s go no further. No thank you!” You’ll feel better, and it’s far more healthier to vent your feelings appropriately than to hold them in.

So, for instance, when ya hear Sarah Palin telling a Fox interviewer that she thinks all this default on the debt limit business is way overblown and nothing is gonna happen, don’t just sit there in disbelief. Call Bullshit!

No such thing as global warming? Bet the folks living along the entire Mississippi River are collectively calling bullshit on that one. The debt ceiling crisis: Bullshit in all it’s meanings. Got to watch it though. I personally can’t watch Rep Eric Cantor without my potty-mouth going total dysentery, and overflowing with effluent. Leaves a foul odor in the air, let alone my mouth

So you get the general drift (don’t breath deeply) of what I’m saying, and how valuable a tool Calling Bullshit is. Use it liberally, yet politely. You may get more mileage out of a straight-up “Fuck You”, (not to mention the emotional satisfaction that goes along with it) but, “Excuse me, I’m going to have to call Bullshit on that one.”  Well that’s so much nicer, polite, yet just as effective. You’ll be glad ya did, and feel better too….And that’s no bullshit.

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Comments on: "Calling Bullshit" (45)

  1. I know what ya mean Hansi. It’s kinda like Obama saying yesterday that 80% od Americans support raising taxes on the rich, when 3 polls in the last week show that the American people don’t support ANY tax increase on ANYONE right now.

    I don’t like the term “calling bullshit” though…I prefer a straightforward “You’re a damn liar!” myself…but then, that’s just me.

    BTW…Bush has been out of office for around three years now. When do you plan to get over it?

  2. Actually Bob, polling does support the President on taxing the rich. Have for a long time. Majorities support a balanced approach to solving debt issue. But I do agree with you. Time to let up on dumb old Dubya. He’s a toddler of idiocy when it comes to the likes of Bachmann, Palin, Gingrich, Santorum, Cantor, DeMint, Brownback, Inhofe, Barton, and the whole batch of TeaPeople braindead idiots produced in 2010. Now that’s bullshit so high it may overcome Mt. Everest.

    • You pretty much said it all. thanks

    • OBAMA: “You have 80 percent of the American people who support a balanced approach. Eighty percent of the American people support an approach that includes revenues and includes cuts. So the notion that somehow the American people aren’t sold is not the problem.”

      THE POLLS: A Gallup poll, cited by the White House as the main basis for Obama’s statement, actually found that 69 percent supported tackling the deficit with a mix of spending cuts and tax increases.

      Obama can get closer to 80 percent, but only by counting those who don’t belong in that group: people who declined to give an opinion or volunteered an idea of their own to reduce deficits.

      Overall, the poll found Americans favor spending cuts much more than tax increases, while supporting a mix of both.

      The polling, with a margin of error of plus or minus 4 percentage points, was conducted July 7-10.

      OBAMA: “The clear majority of Republican voters think that any deficit reduction package should have a balanced approach and should include some revenues.”

      THE POLLING: In the Gallup poll, 41 percent of Republicans supported a package of mostly spending cuts — meaning some tax increases — and 24 percent favored an equal share of higher tax revenue and lower federal spending. The poll surveyed adults generally and was not limited to voters, as Obama suggested.

      In contrast, 48 percent of Republicans in the Quinnipiac poll — which was limited to registered voters — said the problem should be tackled with spending cuts only and just 43 percent said to include some tax increases, too.

      Attribution: News Max

      • Wow….I’ve got to open a window here at Hallucinations, cause I’m startin’ to get a good whiff of bullshit; how sweet it is. I think Sherry is talking about the majority of Americans, and you’re making a point about how Republicans feel. Please correct me if I’m wrong. The latest polls I’ve seen show the overwhelming majority of Americans favor spending cuts with raising taxes for the wealthy and closing corporate tax loop-holes. The mandate of the people in 2010 wasn’t some tea party manifesto as some claim, but the public’s disgust of a Congress that can do nothing. We want action; we want it to be fair and shared, and not ideological bullshit.

  3. The secod pol set addressed Republicans (as opposed to republicans…there IS a difference). The first addressed all Americans. While it does show a majority of Americans favoring a balanced approach with cuts and revenue, it does NOT even coe close to Obama’s claim of 80%.

    The closest you can get to his claimed 80% is adding people who want a balanced approach PLUS people who only want to tax the rich PLUS people who didn’t reject the balanced approach but simply didn’t know what they wanted…and with all that you still miss the claimed 80%…those add up to 73%.

    Hansi…since you folks want fair, fine. It definitely s NOT fair for half of all Americans (OK, 48% really) to pay NO federal taxes, sucking off the teat of the “more fortunate” already.

    While we talk fair, what is fair for the top 1% of earners (> $380,354) paying 38% of all taxes? Or the top 5% (> %159,619) paying 59% of all taxes, or he top 10% (>$113,799) paying 70% of all taxes? Where is the fair in that

    • Hot damn….thanks for all the comments Bob. Publishing this Post has been the most fun I’ve had since I started a food-fight in my college cafeteria. Basically I think both sides, Right vs Left, republicans vs democrats are full of bullshit. People need to find common ground and act accordingly. Like how to grow tomatoes in hanging containers; that’s something one can sink their teeth into.

      • Ah…Hansi, NOW you’ve touched on the crux of our mess…in Washington, in state houses, and to a lesser extent in out local governments, we used to have the “two sides” situation, whether you call it right vs left, Democrat vs Republican, or any other name. No more.

        You obviously missed my post “Two parties, four philosophies…and a tiger by the tail” over at CommonSenseConversation.com. THAT post sums it up quite nicely.

  4. The second poll set addressed Republicans (as opposed to republicans…there IS a difference). The first addressed all Americans. While it does show a majority of Americans favoring a balanced approach with cuts and revenue, it does NOT even come close to Obama’s claim of 80%.

    The closest you can get to his claimed 80% is adding people who want a balanced approach PLUS people who only want to tax the rich PLUS people who didn’t reject the balanced approach but simply didn’t know what they wanted…and with all that you still miss the claimed 80%…those add up to 73%.

    Hansi…since you folks want fair, fine. It definitely s NOT fair for half of all Americans (OK, 48% really) to pay NO federal taxes, sucking off the teat of the “more fortunate” already.

    While we talk fair, what is fair for the top 1% of earners (> $380,354) paying 38% of all taxes? Or the top 5% (> %159,619) paying 59% of all taxes, or he top 10% (>$113,799) paying 70% of all taxes? Where is the fair in that

  5. Hansi, I don’t know much about American politics or British to be honest and I don’t really want to, but I do like your term ‘bullshitee’.

    Bill
    A-U-L, UK

    http://billmurney.com/blog/the-worlds-worst-golfer/

    • Thanks Bill…It’s the same on both sides of the pond. The average, Joe-public kinda guy is the bullshitee. Our politicians are the bullshit-ers.

    • Bill as a recent transplant from the US to NZ where they seem to have more linguistic ties to the UK I’ve been thrilled by being able to add words like “wanker” and “bollocks” to my vocabulary.

      But “bollocks” has been a bit confusing because at first I thought it was interchangeable with “bullshit,” as in “what a load of bollocks.” But lately I’ve heard things like “his wife gave him a good bollocking” and I realis(z)ed I was in a linguistic minefield. What is the real story on bollocks?

      • Thomas, we have many different meanings for bollocks, bollocked or bollocking.

        When we say “what a load of bollocks” we mean what a load of nonsense. Or “it’s the dogs bollocks” means it’s top class. Just “bollocks” is used as an expletive when something goes wrong, the same as you would say “oh shit”.

        “I am bollocked” means I am tired out and “I gave him a right bollocking” means I gave him a good telling off.

      • Thanks Bill. You’re a fountain of (carnal) knowledge. “It’s the dogs bollocks” kind of stuff that I thrive on. Hope that came off OK. I can’t help but thinking that the dog’s bollocks are what canines are busily bent over licking all the time.

      • Thanks Bill! That clears things up. There is a pub in Auckland called The Dog’s Bollix. I haven’t been there so I don’t know if it lives up to its name.

  6. Great parody. There is horse stuff, chicken stuff, owl stuff,rat stuff and several others that each have a unique application.

    • You’re right. Butt, in the End, it’s all ‘stuff’. he he he. Sorry, couldn’t resist a little pre-adolescent humor.

  7. I especially like the term when prefaced by “a bunch of . . .” Because it implies that you’re not talking about the dump of a single bull, but rather a carefully accumulated assortment.

    • “A bunch of” is what ya gotta watch out for when a grouping of political leaders appear together to make a major policy statement.

  8. Hansi, you are a real cack (my highest praise, and not to be confused with anything to do with the subject of your post). “Geezerpuss” and potty mouth going total dysentery .. haha.

    Never once in the eight years of W’s presidency did my Dad neglect to call him “it”.

    Tom, the US doesn’t have “wanker”? Now there’s your issue …

    • There are lots of them over there as I’m sure Hansi will attest–there is just no single noun to capture the essence the way ‘wanker’ does.

      • OK Thank god for Wikipedia! I’d call a wanker a “jerk-off”. But not being an Onanist (your turn for Wikipedia), I seldom use the term. Wanker is by far a richer term, while being highly derogatory at the same time. One thing I love about having international readers, and going to their blogs, are all the new terms I’m picking up which will come in very handy (no wanking for this boy) whilst bullshitting with my buddies. Nothing like an English accent, and British terms, to make ya sound smart over here.

      • Yes, I agree that wanker is a richer term and that’s why I was so delighted to be in a culture that embraces the term. Lately I’ve heard an philosophical treatise get referred to as “a big wank,” someone’s boss as “a heartless wanker,” and an argument concluded by “piss off, wanker.” JO just doesn’t work as well.

      • I was so impressed with the term ‘wanker’ that I decided that I’m gonna do a future post, and have a special category called “What a Wanker”. I’m quite sure I’ll find some deserving recipients.

    • My god…I’m being overwhelmed with English euphemisms I’ve never heard before. “Wanker”, I could take a guess on that one. The US doesn’t have a wanker (should I even be admitting that?), but if we did it would be the biggest and the best 🙂 Bollock and Cack. Well Bill pretty much said it all. It all sounds like some great bullshit to me 🙂

  9. Hansi,
    You are just a born trouble maker. How did you survive in law enforcement for all those years?

  10. Well when “W” told a huge fib, the only way I could express my dis-approval was by covering my mouth , and while feigning a cough, yell out “Bullshit”. I know, it’s a classic ploy but still highly effective.

    Hahahaha. It’s very effective and makes me laugh every time. After 8 years of Bush & Co, you’d think it would be overused. There are still plenty of opportunities. The Ryan plan does not gut Medicare. *cough* Bullshit *cough*.

    • It’s amazing how well the left’s Mediscare tactics work. You know…like a Ryan look-alike pushing an old lady in a wheelchair off a cliff, when the fact is the Ryan plan won’t touch a soul over 55 who is relying on Medcare and Social Security (both unconstitutional, BTW), and fixes a plan that is doomed to fail down the road if nothing is done.

      The difference between conservatives and liberals? Conservatives use facts while liberals use scare tactics, hyperbole, and ***cough*** lies ***cough***.

    • I also seem to be coughing a lot lately. Maybe it’s all the phelm left in my throat from eight years of “W”.

      • Hansi…better get that phlegm thing looked at before Obamacare kicks in. I don’t think phlegm is covered.

        As for your calling bullshit on the other comment…well you should. The Ryan look-alike ad WAS bullshit. Good call.

        Now, if you want to address whether the mediscare tactics are based in fact or are pure bullshit in general, I’ll be glad to go there…but be forewarned, I’ve actually READ every word of both the Ryan plan AND the Affordable Care Act and know what’s in both from ORIGINAL DOCUMENTS, not the spin pablum dished out…by EITHER side.

      • That’s the problem with nasty viruses. It’s the gift that keeps on giving. 😉

      • SL (not to be confused with SNL), you are right on on that one. We’ll be recovering from Obama for decades, if we EVER do.

      • Ah chronic illnesses. Often imitated, never duplicated.

  11. It sure is. That’s why I’m so glad I didn’t turn out to be someone with a blind allegiance to socialism, preferring to be thoughtfully giving my allegiance not to a party, Democrat or GOP, or to an ideology, socialism, but to a constitution that s the law of the land in what once was, and may be again, the best country on earth.

  12. Hey everybody. Hansi here. i just wanted to thank everybody for all the comments. Damn, this was almost as good as goin’ fishin’ with my buddy Geezerpuss, what with all the great bullshitting and all. And its all high caliber bullshit. I’m savoring each and every plop.
    Thanks again for calling bullshit.

  13. true mastery of the bullshit is to be commended. i am such an artist and admire your enthusiastic response to such. p.s is that bullshit enough hansi ?

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